Setting Boundaries in Christian Dating: Waiting Until Marriage

These boundaries aren’t just about avoiding certain behaviors—they help you build a healthy, respectful relationship that keeps God at the center.

1. Physical Boundaries: Keeping Purity

“Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.” – 1 Corinthians 6:18

One of the biggest challenges in Christian dating is setting physical boundaries. The Bible tells us to honor God with our bodies (1 Corinthians 6:19-20), and that means staying pure until marriage. While physical affection is natural, it’s important to know where to draw the line.

• Avoid sexual intimacy: This may be the most obvious boundary, but it’s important to recognize that even small actions can lead to temptation. Agree on what’s okay and what’s not when it comes to physical touch. Keep things respectful and remember your commitment to wait.

• Limit touch: Holding hands or hugging can be sweet, but it’s important to stay aware of how it affects your emotions. By setting limits, you’re able to focus on building your emotional connection rather than physical desire.

2. Emotional Boundaries: Finding Fulfillment in God

“The Lord is my shepherd; I lack nothing.” – Psalm 23:1

Emotional boundaries are just as important as physical ones. It’s easy to fall into the trap of relying on your partner for all your emotional needs, but true fulfillment comes from God.

• Find your security in Christ: Your partner should be someone who supports you, but your security, peace, and joy come from God. Trust Him with your heart, and He will guide you.

• Give each other space: Don’t lose yourself in the relationship. It’s important to have time for your individual growth and to stay connected with God, your family, and friends.

3. Spiritual Boundaries: Keeping God First

“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” – Matthew 6:33

Spiritual boundaries mean keeping God at the center of your relationship. A strong relationship with God will help strengthen your relationship with each other.

• Pray together: Praying together helps you grow spiritually and builds unity. It reminds both of you that God is your source of strength, wisdom, and love.

• Stay accountable: Find mentors, friends, or a church group who can hold you both accountable. Surround yourselves with people who encourage you to honor God and each other.

4. Communication Boundaries: Be Honest and Respectful

“Let your ‘yes’ be ‘yes,’ and your ‘no,’ ‘no’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.” – Matthew 5:37

Clear communication is key to a healthy relationship. Talk about your feelings, your expectations, and your boundaries. It’s important to be honest, but also respectful.

• Be open about what you need: Let your partner know your boundaries and make sure they’re on the same page. When both of you understand each other’s needs, it helps build trust.

• Respect each other’s privacy: While sharing is important, it’s also okay to have some personal space. Let your partner know if there’s something you’re not ready to talk about.

5. Social Boundaries: Protect Your Relationship

“Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.’” – 1 Corinthians 15:33

The people you spend time with and the places you go can affect your relationship. Be intentional about how you spend time together and who you spend time with.

• Choose safe places: Avoid situations where you might feel tempted or where your boundaries could be pushed. It’s better to spend time in public places or with groups of people who support your values.

• Surround yourselves with the right people: Spend time with friends who respect your decision to wait and who encourage your relationship with God.

6. Trust in God for Strength

“I can do all things through him who gives me strength.” – Philippians 4:13

Ultimately, waiting until marriage takes patience and trust in God. There will be times when it’s hard, but trust that God has a plan for you and your relationship.

• Rely on God for strength: When things get tough, pray for wisdom and strength to stay committed to your boundaries. God is always with you, and He will guide you.

• Be patient: Trust that waiting for God’s perfect timing is worth it. Marriage is a beautiful gift, and waiting makes it even more meaningful.

Conclusion

Setting boundaries in Christian dating isn’t about being strict—it’s about protecting your relationship and keeping God at the center. By setting physical, emotional, spiritual, and social boundaries, you’re building a strong foundation for a healthy, God-honoring relationship.

Trust in God’s plan for your life, and remember that waiting for marriage will make your relationship even more beautiful.