The Essential of Christian Marriage

If you’re thinking about marriage or preparing for it, here are five key essentials to keep in mind:

1. Physical Affection Matters

1 Corinthians 7:3–5

“The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time...”

Paul reminds us that in marriage, both the husband and wife are responsible for meeting each other’s needs—physically, emotionally, and spiritually. It’s not just about desire; it’s about sacrificial love expressed even through our bodies. Marriage is more than a spiritual bond—it’s also a physical commitment, and both partners are called to lovingly care for each other in this way.

2. Deep Friendship & Emotional Safety

Proverbs 18:24

“One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

Marriage should feel like coming home. Beyond the spark and excitement, what lasts is the emotional connection—the friendship that sees you through seasons of joy and sorrow. As time passes and physical beauty fades, it’s your bond, laughter, and safety with each other that will carry you forward. Look for someone who stands by you like a true friend, even closer than a brother.

3. Spiritual Maturity

Hebrews 5:12–14

“In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God’s word all over again... But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil.”

A mature believer doesn’t just talk about faith—they live it. Ask yourself: do they lead you closer to God or away from Him? Do they value prayer? Do they encourage purity and humility? Marriage will test your faith, so it’s vital to walk with someone who puts God first in every part of their life and is growing daily in grace and truth.

4. Shared Vision & Values

Ephesians 2:10

“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”

We were created with purpose. Paul teaches that God has prepared good works for each of us—and when you’re choosing a partner, it’s wise to consider whether your life directions are aligned. You don’t have to have the same calling, but your core values and vision for life should complement each other so you can walk in step, not constantly pulling in different directions.

5. Grounded Character & Integrity

1 Timothy 5:8

“Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”

Proverbs 31:30

“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”

Marriage requires real-life grit—sacrifice, patience, work, and faith. Paul teaches that a man who doesn't care for his family fails a basic call of love. Proverbs praises a woman who fears the Lord and works hard for her home. So, when choosing a life partner, look at their character. Are they dependable? Do they persevere through tough times? Do they carry integrity even when no one’s watching?

Final Thought

There’s no such thing as a perfect partner—but there is such a thing as someone who’s committed to growing in Christ. Don’t marry someone just for their potential. Instead, seek someone who fears the Lord, lives with intention, and is already bearing fruit in their life.

“Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.” — Proverbs 16:3